THE OTHER SIDE OF ME
The winter Vacation ended so fast with friends and parent. It’s already March and time for me to go. Packing of Beddings, Buying of School Dresses and other eatable stuffs got packed and tomorrow I am going far away from Home for the First time in boarding school. I will be studying in Class VII.
The Academic session started with all unknown friends missing home and parents for a month. Day by day, month by month I have more friends and becoming comfortable with them. One of my friend Tshering, a sharchop and a daughter of Police officer was too close to me. As the days passed by we used to sit together for meals, for morning studies which we used to study in the class. A month passed and friends started teasing us, making fun of us yet I have been too innocent to know. I have started missing her when she is not around, I used to feel too lonely when not around. Don’t know what I should do and one day one of my friends termed it as LOVE. Am I really in love with her? This is the first time I know the term myself. Yea I think I am in love with her. Now what is next?? Next day I am ready to propose her and speak my love not even giving a thought what if she rejects!!!! Ok I am ready to propose her now…. Called her to the class after the morning study… Ok I started.. “Maybe this will be too surprising for you but I cannot just let it die in my heart; I think I am in Love with u” and I haven’t finished my speech yet before she interrupts… Hey I am so sorry, I already have a boyfriend and you know what would have come across my face!!! Oh GOD…. I m late in proposing her now! Yea I am.
From the next day I cannot even face her. I don’t know I am embarrassed or shy or maybe I have started hating her. We have stopped talking, meeting, and a lot and that is where my new life begins. At first I was just drinking beer or some other drinks to keep myself away from her and I don’t know when did I became so addicted to Alcohol now. Soon or later I have started taking Drugs (marijuana) and I am drugs addict too but for whom or why? I don’t think I have a bigger reason then to just get away from my thoughts and to keep myself away from her.
It’s July, 2000 and now its 4years passed being addicted to drugs and alcohol and keeping my promise never to turn back to girls again or give a second thought in LOVE. I have always hated love and the relationship. Being with friends and enjoying with my friends were my hobbies. By October my parental home burns to ground and have got too many loads on me now but I haven’t left drugging and drinking.
After many hard knocks and a few cruel lessons in life I completely turned my life around from nothing, a sad looser that probably spent all the time on the chair sitting or on the bed sleeping even during day. Am I going to spend my whole life in that? Soon after class X, My interest took me to RTI to be enrolled in Electrical and Electronics Engineering. By then it was 2002 and I already in 20s. Now I have my seniors briefing me and seniors bullying, advising me, Ragging and most of the time I end up being scolded from my brother too. “Hopefully one day you too will take the step to get what you want out of life and takes the success you deserve with both hands, as life doesn't last forever and it's ending one minute at a time! Each day wasted is a day you'll never get back, success doesn't wait for tomorrow” Those were my brothers advice. From my own experience, I know how easy it is to get stuck in a rut and then this becomes a routine, normal everyday living, I've been there; if you fall down….. ….. or you're if you're stuck it does take a helping hand and some guidance to get back on your feet and onto the right path in life, a mentor to show you how to escape the daily grind as well as a little effort to get out and get on living the life you want to lead. I doubt it could be possible to do alone, being wedged in a life you not happy with just becomes the habit, it's nearly impossible to break it all alone and at once. Day by day I minimized taking drugs and alcohol and by December, 02 I totally stopped those substances. Am I doing the right thing? Yea of course it made my brother and parents happy. And myself, I had tough time leaving them behind. Now I am free from alcohol and Drugs and maybe I am not that good to be called a gentleman but to myself I have perfected my life.
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